Free - Prepare your HEART and HOME for Christmas!

Want more meaning in your Christmas this year, celebrating the real reason for the season?

Read our first issue of Kaleo about preparing your home and heart for Christmas! This is a great FREE online magazine from At The Well, where I write monthly devotionals and homeschool help articles. In this issue, my "article" is featured on the cover - the Advent/Activity Calendar. Enjoy! It's FREE! Click "FULL SCREEN" to see it.


Merry CHRISTmas!

Life in a Family Integrated Church!

I cannot say enough about how much we have spiritually grown as a family since attending our family integrated church 3 1/2 years ago. We are blessed to be surrounded by a supportive church family that meets for worship on Sundays, has a weekly fellowship potluck following the service and has monthly prayer and men and women's accountability meetings, as well as other social events!

Moving to a family integrated church was a big switch for us. Both Mark and I grew up in age-segregated churches and after we married we attended one of the largest churches in Charlotte for 9 years before making the big switch. It was different, to say the least.

However, since we began going to our church, Mark has felt encouraged by the other men to LEAD his family in nightly family worship. Was it natural to him? No. He didn't grow up with family worship. Mark tells of how his father, though a Baptist minister, only opened the Bible for family Bible reading twice a year (Easter and Christmas). This family worship thing was something that Mark learned to do. Is he a perfect teacher? No. But, then again, is anyone? Only Jesus!

All I can say, is that when men are "forced" (er, encouraged!) to lead their families in this regular spiritual mentorship, as God has them naturally programmed to do...WOW! God brings together the family in ways that couldn't be done without Dad taking that nightly spiritual leadership role! Men desire to lead their families, but are either never asked, required or allowed to take on that role.

Since starting regular family worship, our kids are now closer to Mark than ever (we have always homeschooled...he's always been very involved, just not in this aspect). They are learning Scripture and understanding Scriptural concepts that most adults can't wrap their minds around. All this is learned either alongside Mark or a day or two behind him! Mark didn't need to go to seminary. He just needed to study Scripture, read it aloud and explain the concepts as he noticed them. The Holy Spirit does the rest...and oh, how cool it is to watch Him move through our worship and Bible reading times!

I'll also say that our pastor has a wonderful way of speaking to all ages. There are concepts that our children don't understand...that's okay. They'll either ask us later (they take notes and write down their questions) or they'll catch what they can for their age and that's exactly what the Holy Spirit had in mind for them! It's kind of like when we have the littles sit in on our history or science lessons. We call it the "school bus stop approach". They listen and their brains "get off the bus" after they have exceeded their attention span. Does that mean it was fruitless? On the contrary...they learn MUCH MORE than we assumed they were able. Same with a family integrated church...we always underestimated the Holy Spirit's workings in our children's hearts and minds! DUH...they have the SAME Holy Spirit we do! ;)

I could go on and on, but I will leave it at that. Oh, and just a few weeks ago...the fathers and sons are on our church's father and son retreat! While they were there they called to say that they were having a blast and that they were all learning so much from the teaching that all the dads were doing throughout each day! I LOVE that!

For those who need idea starters on how to do family worship, here ya go! It's not difficult. It just requires a committed, godly man to take up the natural, God-given leadership role that he hungers for whether he realizes it yet or not (and in the absence of the man, the woman can take up that role in her family). For more information on how to find a family integrated church in your area, click here! To see how we teach our children to listen and learn in church, check out this blog post from a while back!

Replenish Your Soul Online Marriage Conference!

As some of you know, I have contributed monthly to the wonderful woman's ministry, At The Well, since it first began. At the Well is a place to drink deep the knowledge and life experience that comes from living a Christ-centered life as a Titus 2 woman. Each of us on the writing team and staff have a heart to see women’s lives impacted by their faith. We take great pride in our Titus 2 roles and seek to encourage and inspire one another to live fully each day embracing what we have been called to do as women.

Replenish Your Soul is a new adventure that we are embarking on to bring the knowledge and life experience of Titus 2 women straight to you!

Our first conference, To Have and To Hold, is going to be on the topic of marriage. We are so excited about the group of women we have speaking and sharing their hearts with you!

Online conferences are a low-cost opportunity to offer encouragement through live sessions right through your internet browser. If you have a computer and internet connect, then you are ready to attend!

You can watch our conference from the comfort of your living room, in your pajamas, without having to travel, and there is no need to get a baby-sitter! Anyone anywhere can attend!

Blessed...

As one God has blessed with a home, my duty is to create and maintain a
space that honors God, nurtures the spirit, enhances growth, and ministers to
others. My delight is to enjoy the home I've shaped and the sense of
accomplishment that comes from obedience. - Donna Otto

Change The Mood In Your Home!

Repost from 2007

Written by Nancy Campbell

Do you use a timer when cooking and baking? Are you like me? If I don’t use my timer, I end up with burnt offerings. I am usually doing so many things at once, that I’m prone to forget that I have put something in the oven. Often I’ll put the bread in the oven to bake and then come downstairs to my office to answer Above Rubies letters. If I don’t bring the timer with me, I’ll forget all about it – then guess what kind of bread we have to eat?

Recently, I found another use for my timer. It all happened as I was reading the Word one morning. I was challenged by Colossians 2:7, NAS where it says we are to be "overflowing with gratitude" or as the King James Version says, "abounding with thanksgiving." Not only are we to have a daily "attitude of gratitude" but to be overflowing and abounding with gratitude. What does this word ‘abounding’ really mean? The Greek word is ‘perisseuo’ and it means ‘to super-abound, to exceed, to excel, to be in excess – enough and to spare, over and above; it goes beyond that which is necessary.’ Wow! I was challenged! As I continued thinking, I was reminded of how God’s Word encourages us to praise the Lord all day long! Not only are we to be overflowing with gratitude and thanksgiving, but we are to be continually thanking and praising the Lord.

‘How can I continually praise the Lord?’ I thought. ‘How can I constantly have an overflowing spirit of thankfulness?’ I find that I get taken up with what I am doing and the hours go by without thinking about praising the Lord. As I prayed and walked up and down our long driveway (this is where I take my morning prayer walk) God put in my mind the idea of my kitchen timer. Yes, that’s it. What a great idea! Thank you, Lord.

I decided to put the timer beside me as I work on the computer, or when I am busy in the kitchen preparing meals, or cleaning. I set it for half an hour. As soon as it rings, I stop for a minute or two and thank and praise the Lord. I then set it again for another half an hour. Now I am getting into a habit of continually thanking the Lord all through the day. It changes my whole day.

I’m sure you’ll find this a great idea too. You can set the timer each day as you work in your home with your little ones around you, or as you teach your children. When the timer rings, stop for a moment and thank the Lord together. Encourage your children to thank the Lord too. What a wonderful way to teach them to live a life of constant thankfulness and gratitude. Establish this habit pattern in the lives of your children.

By the way, this idea is not just for the days when everything is going great. It’s for the trying and difficult days too. This is when you need the timer the most! Maybe the timer will ring just as the children are fighting and squabbling. This is the very time to stop, hold hands, pray, and thank the Lord together. Maybe the timer will ring just as you are ‘blowing your stack’ and the house is in turmoil. Oh what a blessing to have the timer! You are reminded to stop, repent of your attitude, and praise the Lord instead.

Maybe you are not very happy with your husband about something. The timer rings! Stop and think of five good things about your husband and thank the Lord for him. Or perhaps there is an urgent matter for prayer in your family or for people you know. What a great idea to have the timer ring every half-hour to remind you to pray.

Maybe the timer will ring when you are in a slough of self-pity. This is just the time to praise the Lord. Of course, you may not feel like doing it. Don’t worry. Feelings come and feelings go! Don’t let your life be governed by your feelings. Thank the Lord anyway. 1 Thessalonians 5:23 tells us that God’s perfect will for our lives is to thank Him in every circumstance and at all times.

I’ll never forget the first time God used this scripture to speak to me. It was about 35 years ago when we were first married. I was four months pregnant with Wesley, our first baby. My husband, Colin, left me in New Zealand to serve the Lord on a mission in the Philippines with Tell the Nations Crusade. The horrific part was that I didn’t know when he was coming back. They didn’t know whether the mission would take them three months or three years. In my emotional pregnant state I imagined that I would never see him again. I wondered whether this baby would ever see his father. I was heartbroken.

I went home from airport devastated. I cried inconsolably. Then the Lord spoke to my heart; "Do you want to do my will?" "Yes, Lord," I sobbed. "Then thank me, for this is my will concerning you," I heard God whisper to my heart. Because I wanted to be in His will, I began to thank the Lord for taking Colin to serve the Lord. I didn’t feel like it. I felt the opposite. I thanked Him in cold-blooded faith. I continued until I really felt thankfulness entering my heart. I won the victory. From that time, I lived in the joy of the Lord. God was good and Colin safely returned shortly after Wesley was born.

Dear wives and mothers, I trust that you will find the timer a wonderful idea in your home. You might even need to purchase a couple of extra timers, and keep them in different rooms. Set it every half-hour. Make it a habit of your daily life. Let love, joy, peace, praise, worship, thankfulness, gratitude, forbearance, forgiveness and longsuffering super-abound in your home. Remember, the word means ‘to overflow with more than is necessary – above and beyond.’

AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE ALL DAY LONG

"I will bless the Lord at all times, His praise shall continually be in my mouth." Psalm 34:1

"My tongue shall speak of thy righteousness and of thy praise all the day long." Psalm 35:28

"In God we boast all the day long, and praise thy name forever." Psalm 44:8

"My praise shall be continually of Thee…I will hope continually, and will yet praise thee more and more." Palm 71:6,14,15,24

"Let my mouth be filled with Thy praise and with Thy honor all the day." Psalm 71:8

"Give thanks always for all things." Ephesians 5:18-20

"Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving." Colossians 2:7 NAS

"Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." 1 Thessalonians 5:17, 8

So you want to be a Supermom?

Over the last few years I've heard many moms vent their woes as to why they feel like they are terrible wives and mothers. They usually digress that they are unable to juggle all that life requires of them on top of the fact that they haven't completed projects X, Y and Z before week's end.

The vast majority of these moms have been reading other moms blogs, comparing their own actions and inactions in light of this wonderful supermom who is portrayed on the screen in front of them as having it all together.

Is reading inspiring blogs wrong? No. So, what's the real issue here?

There are a few reasons that these moms usually feel overwhelmed at their imperfections.

1. They feel convicted because of a lack of motivation or lazy attitude


2. They are setting their expectations too high


3. They are over-committed to outside interests and activities


4. They are letting opportunities take over while their so-called priorities are put on the back burner


5. They are comparing their lives to another mom's life, instead of letting the blog properly motivate or encourage them in their calling


6. They are spending too much time on these blogs, instead of digging into God's Word for instructions on how to become a better wife and mom

Because of the many homeschooling blogs out there these days, many people, I'm sure, assume most large family, homeschooling moms must be supermoms. While I believe that raising a large family does indeed take dedication and organization, it does not mean that all dedicated and organized women are born superheroes! While each of those women might have natural abilities and giftings, each are probably working hard to tweak areas of shortcomings in their lives. As women we must remember that each woman who appears successful on her blog struggles herself with her own set of inadequacies. We ALL face the fact on a daily (if not hourly) basis that we are imperfect creatures!

Homeschooling

We ALL need to stop comparing ourselves to another family or friend. It is tempting...especially in homeschooling circles. However, the BEAUTY of homeschooling is that everyone is supposed to be different from the next. If we're all using the same cookie cutter approach, we'd all turn out the same type of child. Pretty boring!
We do need to make sure, as homeschooling mamas, that we stick to our set priorities when making a schedule for our homeschool year or our summers! If we commit to all these wonderful activities just to find that we've abandoned what is truly important to God and our family, then we have failed. Prioritize and stick to the plan!

Housekeeping

As far as keeping one's house up to par. Well...see some of us (ahem, ME!) are borderline OCD with the house. We [I] can let it take over with how we want it. While you might look at my house on a visit and comment on how orderly and perfectly kept it is, I know that my weakness in this area is to let the perfection of my house take over my priority list. That's about when my flesh starts to envy you for being more relaxed.

If you are struggling with laziness, take heed that ALL humans are lazy at times. Commit to God to work harder and earn your keep, so to speak, as wife, mother and homeschool teacher! Don't let the ways of a sluggard sneak up on you. Instead, surround yourself in God's Word and memorize Scriptures that will rid you of a lazy attitude and lifestyle.

Join the Club!

I know that sometimes people have commented on how our family has it all together. Bwahaha! Nope. I don't think so! Nobody has it all together...we are ALL only human! No matter what you might see, hear or read about such "together" families, I can guarantee you that if you look a little deeper or ask what struggles they face as a family, we would get an earfull as to what brings them down a notch or two!

When we get down to it, we're really all a mess in some way, shape or form! We're ALL imperfect! It's LIFE!

So, join the club...we're all imperfect moms and most of us are just trying to do our best! Don't be fooled...we're all human; none of us are true supermoms! We all just rely on the fact that we can "do all things through CHRIST who strengthens" us to be all to all that He gave us to manage and care for!

Are you SURE you're 100% Pro Life?

Hormonal birth control can be abortifacient. Very few know about that, even within the pro-life movement. [See the video and links below]

If you know there is a chance that it can abort babies and still use it or condone the use of it, you are not 100% pro-life. Now, if one changes the definition of when life begins, saying that life begins at some point other than conception or argues that the research involved in determining that hormonal BCs are abortifacient is false, then one could continue to call themself pro-life.

However, believing you are something that you really are not, does not make that something true.

Are you willing to take the risk that the manufacturers’ inserts on these BCs might just be correct? As Ronald Reagan wisely said, “If there’s even a question about when human life begins, isn’t it our duty to err on the side of life?”

Better yet...what would JESUS have you do if there's even a possibility that a life is ended through these methods of birth control?

Proverbs 24:11, 12 "Rescue those being taken off to death, and save those stumbling toward slaughter. If you say, "But we didn't know about this," won't He who weighs hearts consider it? Won't He who protects your life know? Won't He repay a person according to his work?"

Rest assured. God will repay you according to what you knew to be true (or even thought MIGHT be true). Nothing you do is hidden from His sight. Fear God.



Does Life Really Begin at Conception?
Does the Birth Control Pill Cause Abortions?
Ethical Issues Regarding Oral Contraceptives
The Harms of Contraception - From One More Soul

Get Organized and Save!

Order by January 18 and save 35% off the retail price when you use the coupon below*. The "Get Organized…and Save!" Resource Pack will save you hundreds of dollars on regular family expenses. At the incredible price of just $56 (after coupon) for these five hands-on resource books, the knowledge gained from The "Get Organized…and Save!" Resource Pack is an investment that will pay for itself again and again! Use coupon code GETORGANIZED and receive 35% off your purchase.

Learn how to reduce your grocery bill, save time in the kitchen, plan ahead, improve your laundry and cleaning routines, prepare for emergencies, and maximize your budget. Presenting a myriad of inspiring ideas and practical "how to" tips, this collection is sure to be an important part of your day-to-day life and help equip you to excel in running your household.

The Get Organized, and Save Resource Pack includes the following five books:

Cut Your Grocery Bill in Half

Find out how much your family can save in Steve and Annette Economides’ new book, Cut Your Grocery Bill in Half.

Imagine grocery shopping once a week or less, eating healthier, and having more free time — all while saving money. Sound too good to be true? “America’s cheapest family” takes one grocery trip per month — and spends only $350 for their family of seven! For the Economides family it’s a reality, and it can be yours too.

What could the average family do with an extra $3,000 a year? “America’s Cheapest Family” shows you how to use strategies, tips, tools, and tricks in Cut Your Grocery Bill in Half so that you, too, can achieve huge savings year after year. It’s a fact, the Economides say: saving money on groceries is one of the quickest ways to start making a positive difference in your family’s financial future.

And these tips and strategies can work whether you’re shopping for seven or for one!

Spend less time shopping and cooking
Get more bang for your organic buck
Discover kitchen tools that simplify and streamline meal preparations
Learn many ways to eat out or eat in and save big
Turn your freezer into a money-making machine

By Steve & Annette Economides. Paperback. 272 pages.

America's Cheapest Family Gets You Right on the Money

As you read America’s Cheapest Family, you’ll feel like you’re getting your own private coaching session from two frugal experts who preach what they practice. Steve and Annette Economides, a dynamic husband-and-wife duo, include lots of stories — their own, and the stories of others they've helped. You'll be taken through every area of a household budget, from clothes to cars and lots more in between, as you discover how to trim debt and develop the right budget for your home.

Learn to save money and time on feeding your family, plan fun and inexpensive recreation, and even take great vacations — all without debt. It's not about formulas and calculations, it’s more about figuring out what’s really important to your family, and then making it happen.

Get a first-hand “behind the scenes” look at how this frugal family has lived, raised five happy kids, paid off their first house in nine years, never had a car payment, and had lots of family fun along the way.

By Steve & Annette Economides. Paperback. 288 pages.

Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family

Moms have many tasks to tackle and obstacles to overcome: the laundry monster, household clutter and cleaning needs, caring for babies and little ones, menu planning and mealtime routines, town outings, homeschooling, bill paying—and even more!

Like many wives and mothers, author Kim Brenneman didn’t start out with all of the answers. She struggled to figure out: What do I do next? What’s the best way to actually do the many things that need to be done? And how do I get everything accomplished in a 24-hour day and keep my sanity?

In Large Family Logistics, Kim outlines practical solutions she has learned to effectively manage a busy household. This how-to manual is filled with step-by-step procedures, easy-to- understand organizational advice, and a myriad of tips and hints for managing a bustling home with greater efficiency in a way that honors God and builds up family relationships.

Sensible and straightforward, Kim tackles the nitty- gritty, day-to-day challenges moms face and also offers sound counsel on how to plan and accomplish long-term domestic goals. An invaluable home management resource that will equip busy moms to get beyond survival mode and thrive!

Large Family Logistics has lots of helpful ideas to encourage moms to prioritize their lives and get their surroundings organized using creative methods. These tips will free up time and allow moms to stay focused on their children's hearts. —Michelle Duggar of '19 Kids and Counting' How I would have loved to have had a manual like this when I first started having children! Kim's eminently practical book offers real solutions to a multitude of the logistical issues of running a household, and these solutions apply whether you have a household of two or twenty! —Beall Phillips, mother of 8 and author of Verses of Virtue

Problem Solving How-Tos Include:

Fit it All in a Day
Take Control of Clutter
Conquer the Laundry Monster
Homeschool a Large Family
Manage Your Family's Expenses
Train Older Children to Help Younger Children
Achieve Good Physical Health
And Much More!

By Kim Brenneman. Hardback. 312 pages.

Fix, Freeze, Feast 125 Recipes

Learn how to buy groceries in bulk, prepare family-friendly meals, freeze appropriate portions in labeled bags, and defrost and serve whenever a quick, homemade meal is needed. Fix, Freeze, Feast presents a complete system for getting organized and putting healthy, satisfying meals on the dinner table. Most recipes begin with a warehouse club tray pack of chicken, beef, or pork, and include instructions for dividing, preparing, and storing the raw ingredients. A second set of simple directions describes how to thaw and cook the food. With Fix, Freeze, Feast, dinner is always in the freezer!

By Kati Neville & Lindsay Tkacsik. Hardback. 250 pages.

Just In Case: How to Be Self-Sufficient When the Unexpected Happens

Disaster can strike at any time. Be one of the prepared few by following Kathy Harrison's practical plan for emergency self-sufficiency. Learn how to evaluate, organize, and rotate your food supply; pack an evacuation kit; protect important documents from fire; develop a communications system; make nutritious soup with canned and dried pantry items; and entertain the kids in difficult circumstances. Everything you need to know to survive when public services fail is covered in this essential guide to family preparedness.

"An ideal preparedness guide for families." - James Wesley Rawles, editor of SurvivalBlog.com

"This book has information that will save lives." - Russel L Honore

By Kathy Harrison. Paperback. 240 pages.

Nagging Your Children About Chores?

Solution: "Inspect what you expect"! - Large Family Logistics

After your children know what's expected and can properly accomplish their chores, INSPECT WHAT YOU EXPECT....and do so DAILY! Wow, what a novel idea!

Love that book! Click on the image below to order your copy....great instructional book for moms of large [or small] families!

What if a husband and wife disagree about having another child?

Great answer to that question here! Overall, the husband is the head of the home, and should make a decision based on the Bible and God's beliefs about the blessings of children. As long as you are not killing a child (via the abortion, the pill or another hormonal birth control option), then you are correctly under his headship, if he is the one that wants to stop having more children. If *he* is the one desiring another child, pray for unity. Try to submit to his leadership! Read this post from the Jeubs!

Overcoming Sinful Pulls of the Flesh

"Those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires."

Galatians 5:24

As we can see from the above verse, we most certainly have the power to rid our lives of those nagging fleshly desires. Maybe your fleshly desires include procrastination, being easily angered by your husband or children, or not being consistant in disciplining and training your children. Whatever your downfall remember that since we have been crucified with Jesus, by way of our salvation, and that salvation is what enables us to conquer our flesh. However, to succeed in doing this, we must be purposeful in defeating what our natural man is calling us to do. Take every thought captive and make it obedient unto Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). When every thought is taken captive and called to obedience, then your actions will follow. You can defeat your natural man's sinful desires! Be purposeful and surrender your own selfish rights and desires, in order to bring Glory to God and acheive His purpose for you in life!

Welcoming Home Daddy!

• How can we lay a welcome mat of love for our husbands after a long day of hard work?



• How can we make our homes inviting places where Daddy longs to be at the end of a long day?



• How can we involve our children in this process and teach them to show reverence to their Daddy?
  
  A Titus 2 Wife’s Jobs When Welcoming Home Daddy!
  
  “…so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled and pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.” Titus 2:4, 5 (NAS)
  
  Homes are a wife’s responsibility and domain, according to Titus 2. Making our homes a welcoming place for our husbands, when they return home from a hard day of work, is just one way of fulfilling our duties that are laid out clearly in God’s Word.
  
  As “workers at home” we should be striving to have our homes be places of refreshment and rejuvenation for our husbands. All must be done while being self-controlled. We must be diligent in what we do, not complaining about our God-given jobs.
  
  We are to do all for the Glory of God. If we choose to disobey God, we are showing the world a very poor example of what Christian wives and mothers should be. This causes criticism to abound and, therefore, God’s Word is dishonored. Keeping our homes and laying out a welcome mat of love for our husbands are just two ways to make sure that the Word of God will not be dishonored.
  
  Homemade Hospitality
  
  Why do we consider hospitality to be shown only to guests and strangers? Shouldn’t we also be showing hospitality to the provider and king of our home? Show your husband that you appreciate him and all of the hard work he does in providing for your family. Demonstrate your appreciation by looking forward to his homecoming. Show homemade hospitality!
  
  To better understand what hospitality truly is, let us look more closely at the definition and antonyms [opposites] of the word.
  
  Hospitality is a “cordial and generous reception; an act or service of welcoming; hospitable treatment, reception, or disposition; hospitality constitutes a key ingredient of family life.” Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Hospitality [is] a little fire, a little food, and an immense quiet.”
  
  The opposite of hospitality is “hostility; inhospitality; unfriendliness; nneighborliness or unsociableness.”
  
  As the manager of your home, you need to consider whether or not you and your children desire to demonstrate and live out hospitality when welcoming home Daddy?
  
  The first thing that needs to be done in order to properly meet the needs of your husband is to find out what those needs are, as they can be different with each man. Generally, men have a need for honor, love, respect, quiet atmosphere and FOOD!
  
  Seek out your husbands desires and needs. Ask him what he would like to happen upon his arrival; in what order would he prefer things like the meal, clean wife and kids, clean home, time to rest or change clothes, etc. This will make him feel so loved, respected and included in the planning of your day!
  
  Look at this beautiful passage.
  
  “Be kindly affectioned one to another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor; not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer, contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality.” Romans 12:10-13 (NKJV)
  
  Ask yourself if you and your children are showing the specific biblical traits found in this passage to your husband and father.
  
  1. “Be kindly affectioned one to another…” This word affectioned is used nowhere else in the New Testament. It means “tender affection”. Are you showing your devotion and tender affection to him? Are you teaching this to your children?
  2. “…give preference to one another in honor…” Are you giving him preference and honor?
  3. “…not lagging behind in diligence…” Are you showing diligence in cultivating new habits that convey honor, respect and godly hospitality?
  4. “…fervent in spirit...” Are you doing all for the Glory of God? “Do nothing at any time but what is to the glory of God, and do everything as unto him; and in everything let your hearts be engaged. Be always in earnest, and let your heart always accompany your hand.” (from Adam Clarke's Commentary)
  5. “…serving the Lord…” All must be done in an attitude of servitude to the Lord!
  6. “…rejoicing in hope…” Are you grumbling or complaining about the workload (especially in front of your children)? “Use hospitality one to another without grudging.” (1 Peter 4:9) Put on a spirit of rejoicing, renewing your mind (Romans 12:2) throughout the day!
  7. “…persevering in tribulation…” Are you persevering even when it’s difficult to make sure you give your husband a warm welcome?
  8. “…devoted to prayer…” Are you praying for your husband throughout the day? Have you taught your children to pray for him?
  9. “…contributing to the needs of the saints…” Are you contributing to his needs of food, drink, and quietness? Have you asked him what his needs are in order of importance?
  10. “…practicing hospitality…” Are you practicing hospitality by welcoming the king of your earthly home?
  
  Why not commit that passage of Scripture to memory or hang it, along with those questions, in a place where you will see it often? This will help you to shape your attitude and to mold your children’s attitudes when preparing for your husband’s arrival at the end of the day.
  
  A Quiet Resting Place
  
  “And my people shall dwell in a peaceable habitation, and in sure dwellings, and in quiet resting places." Isaiah 32:18 (NKJV)
  
  What are some ways to make your home a peaceful and quiet resting place? Why not let Daddy unwind or relax after dinner? Could the children wait to come to him until after the kitchen and dining area are cleaned and they are ready for bed? Maybe after this time of relaxation he will feel rejuvenated enough to lead everyone in family worship! This can really produce a peaceful atmosphere, as well as have Daddy take the role as spiritual leader and priest in his own abode.
  
  Meditate on these verses about peace, rest, righteousness and sure dwellings.
  
  "Righteousness and peace have kissed each other." Psalm 85:10b (NAS)
  
  "In returning and rest shall you be saved, in quietness and confidence shall be your strength." Isaiah 30:15 (NKJV)
  
  "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)
  
  An Inviting Palace for the King of Your Home
  
  What is a home?
  
  o Shelter – Something that provides cover or protection
  o Haven – a harbor or anchorage or sanctuary
  o Refuge – a comfort in times of trouble
  o A place providing security and happiness
  
  What should a home provide?
  
  o Love
  o Peace
  o Safety
  o Fellowship or friendship
  o Acceptance
  o Comfort
  o Health
  o Healing
  o Rejuvenation
  o Refreshment
  
  One important aspect of a home is cleanliness and orderliness. Shouldn’t we want Daddy to arrive home to a clean and orderly palace? After all, clutter causes stress and the home should be a place of peace, and cleanliness provides an optimum environment for health and healing. Now, don’t get me wrong, this does not mean that your home needs to look like a contender for the feature article in Better Homes & Gardens, but it should be somewhat neat and orderly upon Daddy’s homecoming.
  
  Put the Plan into Action!
  
  Prayer
  
  Have you taught your children by example the importance of praying for Daddy? Praying for your husband is a sweet example of how much we care for and love him. What a display of godly affection for your loved one who works so hard all day for his family!
  
  So you want to begin cultivating this daily routine, but don’t know quite where to start? Begin by having the children hear you pray for your husband. Pray, using his actual name (not Daddy) and let your children see what a praying Titus 2 wife really can be. This will really influence your sons and daughters to do this when praying for their spouse someday! What a generational impact this could have for some time to come!
  
  Teach your children to pray for their Daddy on their own. You can start out by having each child can take turns praying for one thing concerning Daddy. It is okay to prompt them as they pray when they are learning how to pray. As you continue to make this a habit, each child might move on to have their own day each week praying for their father. Can you imagine what kind of things you are able to battle on behalf of your family’s husband and father through this intercessory prayer?
  
  Godly Attitudes
  
  As you work toward making Daddy’s homecoming precious each day, teach your young ones about a true servant’s heart. Show them by way of demonstration and verbal instruction that Jesus told us that to be great in God’s Kingdom we must be a servant of all [Mark 10:44]. No task should be carried out with a grumbling spirit or mouth. All things must be done to the glory of our God!
  
  Quick Pick Up
  
  About an hour before Daddy gets home you and all the children should start getting ready for Daddy’s homecoming! Each child should have set chores or tasks to complete in order to ready the home and their spirits for Daddy! Children as young as 1 year old can have jobs to do.
  
  There should be a quick pick up of the house. Toys put away, things straightened, etc.
  
  Children should all help in setting the table for the evening meal while you get dinner completed either on your own or with children who are ready to start learning the art of cooking. It would be extra nice for the children to have something in which they can take pride in, such as learning to fold napkins in a special way, making place cards, or arranging a special centerpiece! They should also all learn the basics of setting a table properly.
  
  The children and you should be washed up with clean faces and hands. A husband desires a wife who does not look frazzled, even though she might feel like it at times. Seek to please your husband by your personal appearance. At the very least, have your hair combed and have fresh breath!
  
  When the door opens, Daddy should be greeted and welcomed with smiles and warm attitudes! Consider having the children put away his briefcase or hang up his coat for him. Make him feel like the king that he is!
  
  Give Daddy the opportunity to get comfortable before dinner. Let the dinnertime conversation be relaxed. Be sure to instruct the children to first ask Daddy about his day before sharing their stories. Mealtime rules and manners should be established and enforced in order to ensure the tranquility of dinnertime.
  
  Last, but not least, if the children are old enough (I’d say have at least one child who is 8 or older – although any age can help), let them clean up after dinner while you talk one-on-one with your husband. This can prove to be the finishing touch to the gracious reception of your prophet, priest and king! It can also refuel and encourage you to keep fighting the good fight and persevering in your job as a Titus 2 Wife and Mother!
  
  Work on One Thing at a Time
  
  Now, don’t expect results overnight. Work on mastering one of these things at a time. Daddy will appreciate the obvious efforts of you and the children and, most importantly, the Lord will be pleased with the intentions of your hearts, as you learn to grow and walk in Him as a Titus 2 Wife and Mother!
  
  “The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever." Isaiah 32:17 (NIV)
  
  May you seek to be a righteous wife and mother, finding peace through working diligently in Welcoming Home Daddy!

Will your marriage suffer if you have too many kids?

And did he not make one? ...And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Malachi 2:15

It seems to me that this objection can only be raised by those who do not have a truly Biblical understanding of marriage. The church has been infiltrated by many of the world's ideas about what marriage is, and should be, for.

It is true that raising children takes a considerable amount of time and energy, but it does not necessarily follow that that energy would otherwise be devoted to one's spouse. The key to a lifetime of joyful, fulfilling, married life is not freedom from children but commitment to the Biblical directives for marriage. The first and most important thing to realize is that our marriage does not exist to satisfy our personal needs and desires. The primary purpose of marriage is to glorify God. Marriage is not a human invention, but a sacred and divinely ordained covenant.

To understand God's purposes for marriage, it is necessary to look to the account of creation in Genesis 1:27-28 and 2:20-24. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply... And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Adam needed a suitable help meet for his calling of dominion -- specifically, he needed a wife in order to be fruitful and multiply, to have children! We can understand from these passages that a primary purpose of marriage is the bearing and raising of children for God's kingdom. Of course, there are many other ways in which a wife can help and build up her husband, but in no area is she quite so indispensable as in fulfilling God's command to be fruitful and multiply.

We would argue that a Biblical understanding of marriage cannot separate marriage and children. Of course, some couples are Providentially barren, but this does not change the general principal that children are a normal and desireable fruit of marriage. How then could "too many children" cause a marriage to "suffer"?

Of course, a fruitful couple may still have a poor marriage if they neglect the rest of what the Bible says about how a man and wife are to live together. Each Christian couple must strive to make their marriage a truthful picture of Christ's relationship to His church. Husbands are to love and care for their wives sacrificially. Wives are to respect, honour, and submit to their husbands. Aside from your own study of the Bible's words on husbands, wives, and marriage, some of our favorite resources are Steve Schlissel's sermon tapes Husbands, Love Your Wives and R-E-S-P-E-C-T (available from Covenant Media Foundation) and Doug Wilson's book, Reforming Marriage (available from Canon Press.)

In the sharing of duties in your home, are you and your husband satisfied?

Reposted from March 17, 2008

Q. In the sharing of duties in your home (childcare, work, house cleaning), are you and your husband satisfied with the way things get done? If not, how would you or he like it to change?

A. Mark and I believe that I should do the domestic duties in our home of cleaning and cooking, although he does make TERRIFIC breakfasts on the weekends! I, also, do most of the childcare, since I homeschool the children and am a "stayer-at-home" (see below for explanation). I have NO PROBLEM with accepting these as my duties in my role as keeper of the home! I believe that God gave me the role in Titus 2 of being a home worker! I am to be WORKING at home, which if done as it should be done will result in a clean, organized and efficiently run home and family, as is pictured in Proverbs 31. Is this always the case at our home? No....but it is most of time, I believe, because we are all fulfilling our God-given responsibilities.

Let's look at Titus 2:3-5. Note that in the parentheses is the direct translation from the Greek. This helps us to understand exactly what the writer meant! "Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may teach sober [instruct/chasten/correct], the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible [self controlled], pure [modest], workers at home [home workers/domesticators/stayer at home/good housekeeper], kind [good], being subject to their own husbands [obedient], so that the word of God will not be dishonored."

Now, that's pretty clear and straightforward as to our role as wives!

Mark's role is biblical, also, in that he is the provider, protector, and priest of our home. He provides for us, is our protector and he is our priest, meaning that he conducts family worship and devotions!

We are very satisfied in our roles and wouldn't alter them in any way! God's plan is perfect and we never seek to alter His plan for our lives! After all, HE knows what we need better than we do! In obedience to God's plan we will truly find perfect peace!

~ Lisa

Determine what you Treasure

Matthew 6:19-21 “Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” To determine what you treasure, evaluate the amount of time, money, and thought you devote to something. Think about the things you treasure and consider what these treasures say about where your heart is.

New Titus 2 - At The Well Women's Devotional Site! Come Join Us for the GRAND OPENING!

I have had the immense privilege of being a contributing writer for the "At The Well" devotional blog meme for a while now. However, Chelsey (the wonder woman behind the project) is now having a GRAND OPENING for the new "Titus 2 - At The Well" site! February 2nd is the grand opening of the new site. Come by and visit and join us a few times a week to learn more about your role as a wife and mother! This is a GREAT project that I believe we can all benefit from participating in! Join us on February 2nd - mark your calendars now - and check out the new site HERE!

At The Well (Titus 2 Study) - Blessing Our Husbands

As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called— one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. ~ Ephesians 4:1-6

As Cindy pointed out in today's post At The Well, it is important not to tear our husbands down through our words, whether in front of them or behind their backs. We should insetad build them up...always! Praise them in front of others. Convey to them how much we appreciate and cherish them!

Always remember that we are representing Christ through our actions and words. If we speak negatively (in any way) about our husbands, Jesus will know! Nothing is hidden from Him.

Let's strive to speak highly of our husbands when we're around other women. Speaking our negative thoughts will only bring shame to us, our husbands and our Savior!

Lisa Metzger

At The Well (Titus 2 Study) - Welcoming Home Daddy!

I am so excited to be hosting this week's At The Well! This week I chose the topic of Welcoming Home Daddy. I invite you to post your own thoughts, using the discussion questions as a guide, on your own blog! Make sure to use Mr. Linky (below). Simply add your blog to the list so that we can all visit you to see your ideas on making your home a place of peace for your husband and your children's father!

~ Lisa Metzger


Welcome Home Daddy!

• How can we lay a welcome mat of love for our husbands after a long day of hard work?
• How can we make our homes inviting places where Daddy longs to be at the end of a long day?
• How can we involve our children in this process and teach them to show reverence to their Daddy?
  
  

A Titus 2 Wife’s Jobs When Welcoming Home Daddy!

“…so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled and pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.” Titus 2:4, 5 (NAS)

Homes are a wife’s responsibility and domain, according to Titus 2. Making our homes a welcoming place for our husbands, when they return home from a hard day of work, is just one way of fulfilling our duties that are laid out clearly in God’s Word.

As “workers at home” we should be striving to have our homes be places of refreshment and rejuvenation for our husbands. All must be done while being self-controlled. We must be diligent in what we do, not complaining about our God-given jobs.

We are to do all for the Glory of God. If we choose to disobey God, we are showing the world a very poor example of what Christian wives and mothers should be. This causes criticism to abound and, therefore, God’s Word is dishonored. Keeping our homes and laying out a welcome mat of love for our husbands are just two ways to make sure that the Word of God will not be dishonored.

Homemade Hospitality

Why do we consider hospitality to be shown only to guests and strangers? Shouldn’t we also be showing hospitality to the provider and king of our home? Show your husband that you appreciate him and all of the hard work he does in providing for your family. Demonstrate your appreciation by looking forward to his homecoming. Show homemade hospitality!

To better understand what hospitality truly is, let us look more closely at the definition and antonyms [opposites] of the word.

Hospitality is a “cordial and generous reception; an act or service of welcoming; hospitable treatment, reception, or disposition; hospitality constitutes a key ingredient of family life.” Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Hospitality [is] a little fire, a little food, and an immense quiet.”

The opposite of hospitality is “hostility; inhospitality; unfriendliness; nneighborliness or unsociableness.”

As the manager of your home, you need to consider whether or not you and your children desire to demonstrate and live out hospitality when welcoming home Daddy?

The first thing that needs to be done in order to properly meet the needs of your husband is to find out what those needs are, as they can be different with each man. Generally, men have a need for honor, love, respect, quiet atmosphere and FOOD!

Seek out your husbands desires and needs. Ask him what he would like to happen upon his arrival; in what order would he prefer things like the meal, clean wife and kids, clean home, time to rest or change clothes, etc. This will make him feel so loved, respected and included in the planning of your day!

Look at this beautiful passage.

“Be kindly affectioned one to another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor; not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer, contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality.” Romans 12:10-13 (NKJV)

Ask yourself if you and your children are showing the specific biblical traits found in this passage to your husband and father.

1. “Be kindly affectioned one to another…” This word affectioned is used nowhere else in the New Testament. It means “tender affection”. Are you showing your devotion and tender affection to him? Are you teaching this to your children?
2. “…give preference to one another in honor…” Are you giving him preference and honor?
3. “…not lagging behind in diligence…” Are you showing diligence in cultivating new habits that convey honor, respect and godly hospitality?
4. “…fervent in spirit...” Are you doing all for the Glory of God? “Do nothing at any time but what is to the glory of God, and do everything as unto him; and in everything let your hearts be engaged. Be always in earnest, and let your heart always accompany your hand.” (from Adam Clarke's Commentary)
5. “…serving the Lord…” All must be done in an attitude of servitude to the Lord!
6. “…rejoicing in hope…” Are you grumbling or complaining about the workload (especially in front of your children)? “Use hospitality one to another without grudging.” (1 Peter 4:9) Put on a spirit of rejoicing, renewing your mind (Romans 12:2) throughout the day!
7. “…persevering in tribulation…” Are you persevering even when it’s difficult to make sure you give your husband a warm welcome?
8. “…devoted to prayer…” Are you praying for your husband throughout the day? Have you taught your children to pray for him?
9. “…contributing to the needs of the saints…” Are you contributing to his needs of food, drink, and quietness? Have you asked him what his needs are in order of importance?
10. “…practicing hospitality…” Are you practicing hospitality by welcoming the king of your earthly home?

Why not commit that passage of Scripture to memory or hang it, along with those questions, in a place where you will see it often? This will help you to shape your attitude and to mold your children’s attitudes when preparing for your husband’s arrival at the end of the day.

A Quiet Resting Place

“And my people shall dwell in a peaceable habitation, and in sure dwellings, and in quiet resting places." Isaiah 32:18 (NKJV)

What are some ways to make your home a peaceful and quiet resting place? Why not let Daddy unwind or relax after dinner? Could the children wait to come to him until after the kitchen and dining area are cleaned and they are ready for bed? Maybe after this time of relaxation he will feel rejuvenated enough to lead everyone in family worship! This can really produce a peaceful atmosphere, as well as have Daddy take the role as spiritual leader and priest in his own abode.

Meditate on these verses about peace, rest, righteousness and sure dwellings.

"Righteousness and peace have kissed each other." Psalm 85:10b (NAS)

"In returning and rest shall you be saved, in quietness and confidence shall be your strength." Isaiah 30:15 (NKJV)

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)

An Inviting Palace for the King of Your Home

What is a home?

o Shelter – Something that provides cover or protection
o Haven – a harbor or anchorage or sanctuary
o Refuge – a comfort in times of trouble
o A place providing security and happiness

What should a home provide?

o Love
o Peace
o Safety
o Fellowship or friendship
o Acceptance
o Comfort
o Health
o Healing
o Rejuvenation
o Refreshment

One important aspect of a home is cleanliness and orderliness. Shouldn’t we want Daddy to arrive home to a clean and orderly palace? After all, clutter causes stress and the home should be a place of peace, and cleanliness provides an optimum environment for health and healing. Now, don’t get me wrong, this does not mean that your home needs to look like a contender for the feature article in Better Homes & Gardens, but it should be somewhat neat and orderly upon Daddy’s homecoming.

Put the Plan into Action!

Prayer

Have you taught your children by example the importance of praying for Daddy? Praying for your husband is a sweet example of how much we care for and love him. What a display of godly affection for your loved one who works so hard all day for his family!

So you want to begin cultivating this daily routine, but don’t know quite where to start? Begin by having the children hear you pray for your husband. Pray, using his actual name (not Daddy) and let your children see what a praying Titus 2 wife really can be. This will really influence your sons and daughters to do this when praying for their spouse someday! What a generational impact this could have for some time to come!

Teach your children to pray for their Daddy on their own. You can start out by having each child can take turns praying for one thing concerning Daddy. It is okay to prompt them as they pray when they are learning how to pray. As you continue to make this a habit, each child might move on to have their own day each week praying for their father. Can you imagine what kind of things you are able to battle on behalf of your family’s husband and father through this intercessory prayer?

Godly Attitudes

As you work toward making Daddy’s homecoming precious each day, teach your young ones about a true servant’s heart. Show them by way of demonstration and verbal instruction that Jesus told us that to be great in God’s Kingdom we must be a servant of all [Mark 10:44]. No task should be carried out with a grumbling spirit or mouth. All things must be done to the glory of our God!

Quick Pick Up

About an hour before Daddy gets home you and all the children should start getting ready for Daddy’s homecoming! Each child should have set chores or tasks to complete in order to ready the home and their spirits for Daddy! Children as young as 1 year old can have jobs to do.

There should be a quick pick up of the house. Toys put away, things straightened, etc.

Children should all help in setting the table for the evening meal while you get dinner completed either on your own or with children who are ready to start learning the art of cooking. It would be extra nice for the children to have something in which they can take pride in, such as learning to fold napkins in a special way, making place cards, or arranging a special centerpiece! They should also all learn the basics of setting a table properly.

The children and you should be washed up with clean faces and hands. A husband desires a wife who does not look frazzled, even though she might feel like it at times. Seek to please your husband by your personal appearance. At the very least, have your hair combed and have fresh breath!

When the door opens, Daddy should be greeted and welcomed with smiles and warm attitudes! Consider having the children put away his briefcase or hang up his coat for him. Make him feel like the king that he is!

Give Daddy the opportunity to get comfortable before dinner. Let the dinnertime conversation be relaxed. Be sure to instruct the children to first ask Daddy about his day before sharing their stories. Mealtime rules and manners should be established and enforced in order to ensure the tranquility of dinnertime.

Last, but not least, if the children are old enough (I’d say have at least one child who is 8 or older – although any age can help), let them clean up after dinner while you talk one-on-one with your husband. This can prove to be the finishing touch to the gracious reception of your prophet, priest and king! It can also refuel and encourage you to keep fighting the good fight and persevering in your job as a Titus 2 Wife and Mother!

Work on One Thing at a Time

Now, don’t expect results overnight. Work on mastering one of these things at a time. Daddy will appreciate the obvious efforts of you and the children and, most importantly, the Lord will be pleased with the intentions of your hearts, as you learn to grow and walk in Him as a Titus 2 Wife and Mother!

“The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever." Isaiah 32:17 (NIV)

May you seek to be a righteous wife and mother, finding peace through working diligently in Welcoming Home Daddy!

Have I "Arrived" Yet? Is this Perfection?

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

All of us who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you [Greek - reveal; disclose]. Only let us live up to what we have already attained." Philippians 3:12-16

Whew! Now I can relax. No need to be perfect quite yet, although I should have that as my goal. I have not arrived, nor will not arrive until I get to Heaven. What I must do now is:

• Keep running the race


• Focus on what's ahead


• Pray that God will make all things clear to me, so that I might strive to live up to what I know to be true, according to His Word!

You Mean Its Not All About Me?

I just finished reading Passionate Housewives Desperate for God and I just LOVE what it has to say! I highly recommend it. Vision Forum has it on clearance now, so if you don't have it, click HERE to get your copy!

"The enemy of our souls knows that if he can't convince us that God's ways are wrong, he can at least try to convince us that we've misunderstood what God has said....Biblical motherhood means sacrifice, selfless love, and faithful dedication....To recognize our purpose in motherhood, we must see the godly generations beyond our own children....we must die to ourselves on a minute-by-minute basis...Do you feel like you've been losing your life lately? Perhaps you've made the mistake of trying to save it." ~ Passionate housewives Desperate for God

"For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers." 2 Timothy 4:3

".....they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God." John 12:43

"BEWARE lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit, according to the tradition of men, according to the basic principles of the world, and not according to Christ. " Colossians 2:8